C’mon, admit it, you’re a fan of Stefani Germanotta. You do know she’s turning 25 in another month? In just over the last two years, this “lady” has gone from “ate shit until somebody would listen” to a super mo-fo worldwide icon. And now, she (or “it”) has taken her game to a completely ‘nother level with the introduction of two new, and supposedly endorsed, products. Don’t be eating when you read this.
The first product is an ice cream offered by a London company. Guess the flavor? No, it ain’t pralines and dick. More like human breast milk. The company, The Icereamists, paid women to donate their breast milk, had it pasteurized, then churned with vanilla and lemon zest. No surprise that Londoners bought out the entire production within a day, despite its $22.50 price tag for a martini-sized serving of “Baby Gaga”. Gives new meaning to “organic, free range, and totally natural.”
The second product is a perfume that will contain some rather unusual ingredients: blood and sperm. “I wanted to extract the feeling and sense of blood and semen from molecular structures,” proclaimed her Gaga-ness. “(Blood and semen) is in the perfume but it doesn’t smell like it. You just get sort of the after feeling of sex from the semen and the blood is sort of primal. And the blood was taken from my own blood sample so its like a sense of having me on your skin.” Anyone biting that the semen also is of her own creation? Yyyyy-ikes!
Back to more normal news… reading the Friday police report in Florida, a 25 year-old female inmate was being processed to begin serving a 30-day sentence when the deputy standardly asked “if she had anything on her she was not supposed to have.” Don’t ask me how I know, but the standard response is a “No.” What got reported from the newly frisked prisoner was, “Just pills in my vagina.” The pills turned out to be medication used to treat drug addiction, and it got her an additional felony count for introducing contraband. Something tells me I really gotta try some of that Florida wine…
Edmonds Winery always gets weird responses from noob wine drinkers in the warehouse district.”Edmonds? I thought we were in Woodinville.” “Is your winery in Edmonds?” “Is Edmonds the winemaker?” No. No. No. Robert Douglas and Lael Peterson originally started their winery in the garage at their residence in the quaint ferry town of Edmonds back in 2002 and was one of the earlier wineries to occupy space in the warehouse district. They moved to their current space recently to accommodate the growth and even had a second winery, Douglas Wine Cellars, next to Flying Dreams Winery in the F-wing. Doug tends to favor blending reds as evidenced by his bottlings of Slide Ridge, RobtD, and Delorious, so consider him a fan of Brian Carter’s wines.
A word about this winery before I continue on. Something about this winery has attracted some rather fierce loyalists to its fanbase. Detractors will call this type of fanaticism…delusional. I won’t name any names here, but we know who we are talking about. Simply put, if the wines are really all that, then wild devotion is really not best added to the equation. Especially, when no one else agrees to that extent. Enough said.
A recent visit to the tasting room left me with some strange vibes. Really, I do like Doug and Lael a lot. They make good wines at a fair price. I don’t know if it’s the lighting or the fact that “fan no. 1” was hovering during my tasting, but the experience felt somewhat creepy. Not a whole lot of vibe going on, but the wines, both red and white, held their own. $5 refundable tasting fee.
Food pairing was chicken marsala and sautéed mushrooms—pretty good.
Tasted at 60-68 degrees on the IR temp gun. Color: dark ruby. Nose: red plum. Mouthfeel: light. Tail trail: 4 seconds. Flavors: cola, black cherry, dank mushrooms (quickly disappears). Let it breathe a couple hours to give it life.
Alcohol: 13.5%. 97% syrah, 3% cab sau. Winery website does not post this wine (and others) that was poured on my visit. And, other reviews equally did not bother to reveal much technical info. Walla Walla AVA. Rated: 89. Value: $17. Paid: $20 (I think). Music pairing: “Oh Lonesome Me” by Don Gibson. This is WAwineman…uncorked, uneducated but not uncouth.