Girly Girl Wines 2008 chardonnay

Another WAwineman classic, 1st posted on September 1, 2010:

An Irvine golfer at the Shady Canyon Golf Course (membership cost $300,000) fired the sizzling shot of the day using his Taylor Made WormBurner iron and inadvertently clipped a rock that sparked and lighted the dry rough, which turned into a 12-acre blaze before 150 firefighters put it out. Contrary to earlier reports, the golfer was not in a “matchplay” tournament. It’s one thing to have a pain-in-the-ass personality, it’s quite another when a 52 year-old moron (no, not me) who was hiking Blewett Pass tried to move his .40-caliber gun from its holster to his back pocket and it ended up discharging. The bullet shot down his left “cheek” and leg and rested just above the knee. I heard Blewett Pass was dangerous to climb, but I didn’t think the Second Amendment was necessary. Not to be outdone, a New Hampshire knucklehead high schooler attached, gawd I have a difficult time picturing this without LOL’ing, an electrical clamp to one of his nipples while another student clamped his other nippie and a third student plugged in the cord. He was critically injured (and his heart stopped beating) but he ended up suing his teacher, the school district, and the city of Dover. As for me, my memories of high school was never this…titillating. …sorry, couldn’t resist. And, for you sickos, a 54 year-old Kirkland woman was arrested for being accused by her given-up-for-adoption son of…incest. Of course, it takes two…what the hell was the 33 year-old son thinking??? Ick.

Not quite nearly as icky, but still feeling a little, uh, disillusioned…this is one of those times I TRULY sacrifice for you readers. Yeah, you boyz owe me big time for this one. Some background as this is actually a textbook lesson in effective retailing of wine. I was cruising the nearby WineStyles store and was courteously approached by a gorgeous, young woman (from a Walla Walla-area family that sold its winery to a corporation) who wasn’t pushy. I asked her if she tried this bottle and we got into a good conversation about wine and she poured me a sample that she had open. The sample was nothing notable but we talked about other wines and she even poured me a sample of a Dutch chocolate wine which actually reminded me of my Kahlua-and-crème disco days. She also discussed having the 14 Hands lineup of wines available, but for whatever reason, I ended up buying this bottle. She had good timing. Buyers remorse? Read on.

Girly Girl Wines is produced and bottled in Zillah, the heart of the Rattlesnake Hills AVA, although there’s no chance of finding this “winery” along the wine trail there. Besides, Gail Puryear wouldn’t allow it if he heard of this winery. The truth is, this brand is an offshoot of Washington Wine and Beverage Company, better known to everyone as the parent public company of Silver Lake Winery, Glen Fiona, and Blind Date Wines. While I have yet to notice any of the Twitter-fems wooting about female-targeted wines like that from Olympic Cellars’ Working Girl wines or the O Wines that benefit scholarships for young women, there apparently must be a profitable reason to tap into this growing sector of wine purchasers.

Karen Ward, the Director of Operations, hired a winemaker that apparently lives in California but is obsessed with marketing wine toward women. This is a continuation of the ‘women’s lib’ movement of the ‘70’s where women now are armed with a sizable pocketbook and don’t need a man to make purchasing decisions concerning beverages. Geared toward girly-gatherings after work, the lineup of four wines (pinot gris, merlot, and cab sau) see no new oak but are given a standard fermentation and aging process. This leads to flavors true to the varietal without any put-off flavors of toasted wood. No complexity, but no snobbiness either. Straightforward, clean, and pure…perfect after a day of competing with the boyz in the office.

Tonight’s grinds on a rainy August day was good ol’ curry made with frozen mixed vegetables, kimchi, and pickled radish. This chardonnay paired particularly well with the radish. Note to readers: get out of your comfort zone and what other pubs “recommend” for food pairings and go discover what works for you.

Tasted at 43-51 degrees on the IR gun, similar to party conditions. Color: very light straw. Nose: green apple, some barnyard (at higher temps). Mouthfeel: surprisingly medium-weighted. Tail trail: 3 seconds. Flavors: mild lemon squeeze, a slight tinge of sweetness, then at higher temps—green apple, imported pineapple, and some farm funk.

Alcohol: 13% (website: 13.7%). Labeled Columbia Valley but is actually 100% Roza Hills Vineyard in the Rattlesnake Hills AVA, nested within the Yakima Valley AVA. 96% chardonnay, 3% sau blanc, 1% gewürztraminer. Vineyard blocks 1, 9A, 9C and 11. TA 0.68. pH 3.49. RS 0.36%. Crushed and pressed on September 17 and 18, 2008 at 23.6 Brix, TA 0.60, and pH 3.50. Treated with 15mL/ton Pec 5 enzyme and 35 ppm sulfur. Triple filtered. “This girl’s a tart. She’s unoaked and simple, the way she’s meant to be.” Fuschia Stelvin cap. “Hi, I’m Mia! I’m the kind of girl who loves going to the spa and being pampered. After a long day of work, a manicure and pedicure with my favorite girls does the trick. Then we get together at one our houses to enjoy a great bottle of Girly Girl Wine before hitting the town!” ~Mia. Okay… WineStyles classifies this as “rich”. Rated: 87. Value: $9. Paid: $15. Music pairing: “Good Timin’” by Jimmy ‘Handy Man’ Jones (still alive). This is WAwineman…uncorked, uneducated but not uncouth.

What? You thought I’d pick Cyndi Lauper, who’s coming to Woodland Park Zoo on Thursday? I’m one step ahead, as always…

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