Episode number 358 of “When life imitates local wine bloggers.” A 20 month-old Cambodian wine blogger, er…baby boy, has learned to get his meals from suckling on an udder of the family’s cow. No, I did not say Margot. I said “the family’s cow.” The boy’s parents left him behind so they could search for work. Sounds like the boy is a 2nd generation wine blogger after all (and in a typical responsible wine blogging family). Closer to home…on Camano Island, a 72 year-old husband of a state legislator was found guilty of groping and fondling the boobies of his wife’s 28 year-old former campaign manager and was ordered to pay a stack of 50s for the brief pleasure. Greg P. Utt intervened, “I should have invited that lemon over to my nursing home, where the teabags are a hella lot cheaper in Waitsburgh!” Hey Utt, that was tmi, dood. Back in your toilet-seat wheelchair, ya old fogey. And finally, I guess there were a few wine bloggers from their recent little convention orgy that still couldn’t find a flight out… Beachgoers at Virginia Beach were disgusted to find wine bloggers (damn, confused again), I meant “smelly softball-sized blobs” had washed ashore. Health department officials initially speculated they were the last wine moochers to leave the grand tasting after-party, but later reasoned they were just skunk sponges. The blobs didn’t stop people from going to the beach and some kids even enjoyed fingering the ones named “Sean.”
Sometimes, I am left completely at a loss of words when I read a blog, and the entry from Stacy Trasancos’s “Accepting Abundance” could beat out every local wine blogger for the most pathetic post this year. I have plenty enough Catholic friends (but none with seven kids in tow) and even dated a few, but I just had to wonder how much Stacy (and anyone else) used religion as justification for discrimination. This Catholic woman explains why she has “a hard time even leaving my home anymore” and gives examples of witnessing homosexual couples at the local pool “rubbing elbows,” watching her daughters “doting on the baby with two ‘mommies,’ and going to the park and witness two women “rubbing each other’s back” while watching and enjoying the laughs from an infant boy in a bucket baby-swing. She plays the sob-story about she pays her taxes and plays by the rules, so why should she be subjected to potentially having to answer questions from her offspring about the sexual orientations of others. Of course, it doesn’t help that she exhibits classic homophobe traits where “two men or two women (in a relationship)…live in sodomy.” Let’s just make this clear: this is an extreme view of a sheltered individual who is hiding behind her distorted religious views to direct how people in her community should live. Sounds familiar? Like, those Muslim extremists using violence because they think it is dictated in the Koran. I would pay to watch her maneuver like she’s in a sterile-suit through a wine bloggers meeting then watch Sean and Greg P. Utt drinking out of the same plastic wine cup and… Oh snap! She’s from Massachusetts. So is that closet-homophobe Sean. Now it all makes sense. Their blogs do sound eerily similar in tone, twisted facts, and the “I’m better than you” high-school style attitude. Thanks for nothing, assholes.
Buried Cane is the Washington value-tier wines (Cadaretta is the premium label) of the Middleton Family Wines company, originally based in Hoquiam. Other sub-brands include California representation in Clayhouse (Paso Robles) and Clayhouse’s second-label Adobe, and western Australia’s Ad Lib wines. The company is headed by Richard Jr., James, Molly Tuohy, and James Edminster and will open a tasting room on Main St. in Walla Walla soon.
To the wine…
Food pairing was recession-special corned beef and onions plated next to a flank steak. Easy and simple.
Tasted at 63-68 degrees on the IR temp gun. Color: light maroon. Nose: black cherry, aromatic red fruits. Mouthfeel: light. Tail trail: 4 seconds. Flavors: black plum, blackberry.
Alcohol: 13.3% (website 13.5%). Stelvin cap. 10% syrah. pH 3.79. TA 0.53. Bottled July 22-24, 2009. 2957 cases. Rated: 87. Value: $9. Paid: $7. Vinted and bottled by Buried Cane, Pasco. Music pairing: “Thanks For Nothing (Kiss My Ass)” by The Downtown Fiction. This is WAwineman…uncorked, uneducated but not uncouth.