Washington wine bloggers are not the only idiots in the industry, as evidenced by the Thanksgiving theft of some $600,000 worth of stored wine at Esquin Wine Merchants. Two men (likely ex-wine bloggers) who the Esquin staff were familiar with, after renting out lockers themselves, were recognized on security video before the cameras were painted over and are strong suspects in the poorly organized heist. The men took about 13 hours to cart off some 200 cases of storable wine. One of the bunglers has been arrested and it’s only a matter of time before stooge number 2 gets ‘cuffed. So, if you never hear from the likes of Jameson… now, you know. Aaaaand, readers are by now familiar with that other former wine blogger (prolly from Connecticut) who jacked a Victoria Clipper boat from the Seattle waterfront just so he could go to West Seattle (and prolly return to his condo he rented from Paul Gwine) but ended up doing donuts in the middle of Elliot Bay before the water SWAT po-po corralled the perp. As a note, the guy is a Level 3 sex offender and was previously known for busting into a coffee shack full of female baristas and swizzling his stick in front of them. If you heard Sean screeching “Hooray!” lately, it was for the recent announcement that the railroad conglomerate relented and allowed for same-sex bennies for its employees to avert a costly and embarrassing lawsuit. If you didn’t hear Sean, then he was probably experimenting with how to get an Amazon drone to deliver a box of size 10 buttplugs to his flat in the scrubs of Wallingford. Finally, there’s the fishwrap’s fifty spotlighted wines written by that useless, shit-palate tool. Like really… the guy knows nothing about Woodinville’s hundred plus labels and what is being sold here. Not a single chardonnay (other than a bubbly from Canadia) in the group means this bearded assbite missed out on Sparkman Cellars 2012 Lumiere, Guardian Cellars 2012 Entrapment, and JM Cellars 2012 edition. And, that Glaze 2010 cabernet was released in 2012, not this year. Fuckin’ retarded Perdildo.
Speaking of assholes, it has come to the attention that a senior wine writer recently wrote about his wine experiences on a cruise that he booked after reading about the idea from this blog. We all know where original, creative wine blogging occurs (hint to wine bloggers: you’re reading it, bitches) and it ain’t with the old goats and lemmings that pervade the local wine blogging scene. Then, there’s the Walla Walla wine report who claims to be an “independent” wine blogger even though the slimedog gives rimjobs for free wine, especially if it’s from Walla Walla. Notice all the exceptional ratings given to any wine from a Walla Walla winery, whereas other regions have to basically grab their ankles and spread boysenberry jam over their sphincters to just get a useless, non-influential mention. Like really, what good is a rating system when only your “buddies” get the top vague rating? It’s bullshit, but of course, bullshit-eating wine wannabes devour that crap and some even buy just to satisfy curiosity. That’s why you should appreciate the millenials and their broke-ass attitude toward wines where they idolize cheap, sweet cabernets and anything in a box. No wonder all the good stuff is going to those stanky robots in China.
‘Lorelle’ is the second label for J. Albin Winery of Hillsboro, OR. This allows the winery to sell sub-$20 pinot noir and pinot grigio, some from estate fruit, and maintain cash flow. John Robert Albin, 57, has been growing pinot noir from his estate Laurel Vineyard since 1981 and is the former winemaker/vineyard manager for King Estate so you know this guy can make pinot. The name ‘Lorelle’ is likely a tribute to his mother, Lorraine Sharon Albin.
The other secret half of this wine’s origins lies with C&G Wines, a distributor in WA and OR since 2003. Their focus is on wines with a sense of place that break the stereotypes that powerful wines are dark (extracted) or complex wines are expensive. As you know from this blog, we also dig deep to find those overlooked gems that most consumers poo-poo. As a consumer, it sucks to read about some unknown wine being touted for its whatever traits, especially from a Woodinville winery where the wines are easily accessible (but always hidden from industry nights).
Cave & Gabare Wines distribute some labels you may know: Tempus Cellars, Southard Winery, Crowley Wines, Daedalus Cellars, Analemma, Racine Wine Co., McKinlay Vineyards, Tendril Wine Cellars, P.S. Wines, and J.K. Carriere Wines. Of course, they also distribute European wines, but that’s not within the scope of this blog.
For whatever reason, despite the nomenclature (pinot grigio/pinot gris) describing the same grape, some winemakers choose to differentiate between the two by using pinot gris as a more fruit-forward wine whereas the pinot grigio hints at its Italian roots and produces a more “dry” version. It’s a nice marker, but really, who cares?
Paired with Kraft Singles and Wheat Thins Stix. Smooth.
Tasted at 54-62 degrees on the IR temp gun. Color: straw. Nose: pink grapefruit, tangerine tea, peach. Mouthfeel: medium. Tail trail: 7 seconds. Flavors: grapefruit zest, green apple.
Alcohol: 12.5%. Vineyard: The Benches. Horse Heaven Hills AVA. No winery website. Distributor website woefully outdated. Stelvin cap. Power: 2/5. Balance: 2/5. Depth: 2/5. Finesse: 2/5. Rated: 88. Value: $14. Paid: $12. As a side note, this is the 2012 vintage. If some “glorified” obscure second label can punch above its price, then this lends further confirmation that the advice from this blog of “skip the 2010/2011s and save your cash for the 2012s” is valid. No winery will advocate that advice as they have stash to sell, but the truth is… early indicators prove us right. The 2012s are rockin’. You may say I’m losing my mind or even going insane, but you know it’s true. Music pairing: “Keep Me Crazy” by Chris Wallace. This is WAwineman… uncorked, uneducated but not uncouth.